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Shame & Guilt Counselling in New Westminster, BC

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by shame and guilt, you’re not alone. Our online counseling services in British Columbia provide a safe and understanding space to explore these emotions.

Our shame and guilt counseling services in New Westminster offer a safe in-person and online space to talk about your experiences without judgment. We help you understand the reasons behind your feelings, identify any recurring patterns or underlying problems, and develop more positive strategies for dealing with them.

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Shame Guilt Counselling in New Westminster

Understanding Shame & Guilt

Chronic shame and guilt are often not linked to a specific current event but stem from a constant underlying feeling. People who have experienced past trauma may develop “core shame” and may be more sensitive to feeling guilty about current events and internalizing others’ accusations.

When someone feels guilty, they usually believe their behavior was wrong. Guilt can encourage people to make amends and feel connected to others. On the other hand, shame is when someone feels bad about themselves, with no hope for redemption. Understanding the difference between guilt and shame is essential to support others effectively.

Self-esteem and developing a sense of self separate from early influences that caused deep shame or a tendency to feel guilty are likely crucial in counseling for shame and guilt.

This process may include experientially learning:

  • How the brain and mind work can help you comprehend your feelings and behaviors, especially regarding your experience.
  • What is stress, and how can you best manage it to maintain some ’emotional balance’ during the waves of guilt and undercurrent of shame?
  • How can we identify hidden thoughts, feelings, and beliefs that have led to maladaptive guilt and core shame, apart from those internalized during development?
  • Adopting new, more flexible, positive beliefs about yourself, others, and the world influences how you automatically interpret and anticipate things.
  • In counseling for shame and guilt, you will learn to communicate and relate with others (and yourself) positively.
  • How can we find, understand, and handle the different kinds and levels of emotions that cause guilt and shame and the need for safety and connection that come with them?
  • Learn new ways of thinking and problem-solving to handle life’s challenges better.
  • Discover practical principles to approach life’s challenges with more peace of mind and success.
Shame & Guilt Counselling | Local Therapists at Wellspring

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What is Shame?

Shame is a strong feeling caused by different experiences, from a small mistake to something more traumatic. It can make you feel like you don’t like yourself or are not good enough, and it can stick around even after the situation. Shame often involves feeling like others are looking at you critically, leading to feelings of sadness and worry and avoiding being around others.

Shame can be connected to a person’s core beliefs about themselves or the world around them. It might also stem from past experiences, like feeling shamed or excluded by family or peers.

Signs and symptoms of shame:

  • Avoiding eye contact
  • Feeling embarrassed or unworthy of attention
  • Having a negative self-image
  • Difficulty connecting with others
  • Feeling isolated and disconnected from the world around you

What is Guilt?

Feeling guilty is similar to feeling ashamed, but it has unique characteristics. It happens when you regret doing something wrong based on moral standards. This feeling often comes after making a mistake or a bad decision, leading to regret, self-doubt, and distress. Unlike shame, guilt is usually about your judgment rather than criticism from others.

Signs and symptoms of guilt:

  • Difficulty forgiving yourself
  • Feeling responsible for the bad things that happen to you
  • Over-apologizing or self-blaming
  • Avoiding situations that remind you of your mistake
  • Inability to enjoy pleasures and successes due to guilt

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Clients Say

Testimonials

Mr. Gordon is someone that captures the spirit and the heart of active engagement. He is empathic, genuine and incorporates action and creative problem solving into his practice. I have no hesitation in recommending Mr. Gordon as an effective career and personal counsellor.

NA

I had no experience with therapy and was unsure of the whole process. Alistair made everything very accessible and unintimidating. It was clear that he puts quite a lot of effort and preparation into every session. I'm so glad that I decided to do this, and could not have asked for a better person to help me with this. I would highly recommend Alistair to anyone who has ever thought that they might benefit from talking to a professional.

EH

I am a young professional which for a long time now, has struggled with anxiety, insecurity, and difficulty in finding effective life coping mechanisms. Alistair was referred to me by a friend and upon the first meeting, I found Alistair to be empathetic, compassionate and intuitive. I have now been seeing Alistair regularly for 6 months and through that time my anxiety has significantly decreased, I have found effective methods of dealing with stress, found support dealing with identity issues, as well as finding inner strength to get through a tough break up. Alistair again and again, went the extra mile -thank you Alistair for your candor, openness and a safe space to get support. Thank you for playing such a large role in keeping me healthy and positive.

KL

I have been working with Alistair Gordon as my counsellor at Wellspring for almost 6 months now and cannot begin to tell you how far I have come with his help. I have tried working with other counsellors and therapists in the past but never really found one that clicked for me. I always felt judged, unsupported, and rushed at those appointments until I booked my first appointment with Wellspring and with Allistair. To anyone on the fence about booking an appointment or engaging in therapy: if you are willing to do the work, you couldn't ask for a better partner in your healing journey.

ER

When I decided to find a counsellor, I tried to find someone that I could relate to, someone that is like-minded and down-to-earth and with Alistair I really found the right person. He uses an integrative approach, showed me techniques to relax and get aware of my emotions, and helped me see things in a new perspective. Of course this is an ongoing process but I enjoy meeting and working with Alistair every time. The downtown office is a very neutral place - not too intimate, not too clinical - which is helpful to overcome apprehension, especially the first couple of times. What I find remarkable is that Alistair almost always knows what I'm trying to say, even if I can't put it into words. Working with Alistair helped me a lot and it was the right decision to put my trust in him.

MA

Alistair really cares about you the person, and I could really feel him trying to tackle my challenges. He was also very available for off-session contact via text and email. I think he did a great job with confronting me where I needed it. Alistair always could remember the important peoples' names in my personal life, which really helped with talking about my problems. I really felt like I was talking to a friend.

MS

Alistair is an awesome counsellor. He has been so helpful in working with me through some tough times in my life. He's always been available to chat with me in-between sessions. I'd recommend Alistair to anyone - he's really the ideal counsellor in my view.

JG

I enjoy how sessions are collaborative where I can take the lead for the direction of what we talk about, and at the same time I know that Alistair will offer helpful guidance and insight along the way. I also like how we focus on the future instead of just the past. I find this to be empowering and helpful to move forward in life.

RM

Alistair is an awesome counsellor. He has been so helpful in working with me through some tough times in my life. He's always been available to chat with me in-between sessions. I'd recommend Alistair to anyone - he's really the ideal counsellor in my view.

JG

I have always felt very comfortable with Alistair. He has a calming presence, and you can tell he cares about being the best counsellor for you. He helps you with all aspects of your concern, and is always able to help me find a solution to the problem I'm having.

SD

Alistair is an exceptionally talented counsellor and has always demonstrated strong ethics, great compassion, wisdom and respect for others. I highly recommend him as a counselling practitioner.

MB

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Ready to Prioritize Your Wellbeing? Book Your First Session at Wellspring Counselling in New Westminster Today!

Heal with Wellspring Shame & Guilt Counselling

Our experienced therapists and counsellors at Wellspring Counselling in New Westminster can help you understand why you feel guilty or ashamed, how it affects your behavior, and develop ways to manage these difficult emotions.

We offer a caring and supportive environment where you can freely express yourself without worrying about being judged or criticized. Our support can help you learn to manage your emotions more healthily and gain the strength to move forward.

Find Inner Peace, Attain Empowerment, and Self Compassion. Contact Wellspring Counselling Today!

Shame & Guilt Counselling in Vancouver | Local Counsellors at Wellspring