Counselling & Therapy for Shame & Guilt in Vancouver And Online
When a person feels chronic shame and guilt, it is often not tied to a specific current event but comes from an ongoing feeling that is always there. This is called “core shame,” a deep sense of not being good enough or worthless that is especially common in people who have experienced trauma in the past. These individuals may also be more sensitive to feeling guilty about things happening now and taking to heart the blame or perceived blame from others.
When we feel guilty, it’s because we think we did something terrible. This feeling can help us make things right and keep the rules. But when we feel shame, it’s about thinking we are flawed. We might believe there’s no way to make things better. Guilt can make us feel sorry, but we still feel loved and can make things right.
Early experiences that shaped a pattern of core shame or a predisposition and sensitization to feelings of guilt are likely part of the counseling process for shame and guilt. In this journey, a skilled counselor plays a crucial role, providing support, guidance, and tools for building self-esteem and separating oneself from the influence of others.
This process may include experientially learning:
- Understand how the brain and mind function to grasp better your feelings and behaviors related to shame and guilt.
- Learn about stress management to maintain emotional balance when experiencing guilt and shame.
- Identify hidden thoughts and beliefs that contribute to maladaptive guilt and core shame and their relationship with other emotions like anger and sadness.
- Form new, constructive beliefs about yourself and others to change automatic interpretations and expectations.
- Develop healthier ways of communicating and relating with others and yourself while focusing on emotional boundaries and self-agency.
- Understand and manage various underlying emotions associated with guilt and shame, as well as the need for safety and connection.
- Acquire new thinking tools and problem-solving techniques to deal with life’s challenges and manage guilt and shame.
- Learn practical principles to approach life’s challenges with greater peace of mind and success.
